Not a big fan of this waiting stuff...

I just wanna share, I know I keep saying that but.....anyways, yesterday I had the PET and the test wasn't so bad to go through....BUT I didn't get any results! They said they will send it to my Dr's office and they should have it on Friday when we go at 2:45. I am thinking I haven't told ya'll this yet but tomorrow they are going to go ahead and put a port in at 2:15. This is just something that they put in my chest to be able to give the chemo through instead of keep messing with my veins. My surgeon says that I can wash and stuff with it b/c it will be under my skin...really not sure how all that's gonna work but whatever I need to do. The breast care nurse called me from the hospital and explained some things better to me and I felt ok...I don't think I told ya'll this either but my oncologist said that if it had spread then it is not curable :(. I don't think I quite understood...I am thinking I am doomed...but the nurse explained it that if it is just breast cancer the goal is to cure me...I guess as in cut them off and I told her I want them both gone even if there is nothing in the other one!!!!! If it has spread then the goal is to shrink the cancer and get it at bay to buy me years - I am not real fond of this idea of it not being totally gone!!!! And really, ultimately, who is in charge of all this - GOD! BUT I am jumping ahead...it kind of sounds crazy but I will be so thankful if it is only breast cancer! I really pray still in the name of Jesus that they are going to say WHOA, there is nothing there....BUT we don't know His plan right now!!!! The nurse said she met with the surgeon and that they explained my situation and it sounded like they are ready to "pounce" on this! I am like put the port in and where do I go for chemo...but she said they will probably start me Monday if not Friday. She said it also depends on how the cancer reacts to the chemo...my surgeon, told me that some people take chemo twice and they are cancer free and some take chemo and nothing happens...Either way God's carrying me through this and it may not be easy but He never said it would be! So that's what's going on until Friday's treatment plan from the doc. Oh and for those asking about Micah's first day...I went to pick him up and I said "hey, are you ready to go" He says "No" ...I was like see ya later thinking he would come and he says "OK"....The last few days when I have gone to wake him up at the crack of dawn ...He says "Is it time to get ready for school" so excitedly!! I miss that little one but I am so glad he LOVES it and so thankful he has such loving precious teachers!!!! Thanks once again for listening!